Thick Description

The First Spot

Walking to that little brown bench,

I feel a sense of relief.

That spot – the first spot –

I’d been to

was my first spot on campus.

Life forever changed.

Memories forever made.

My brother and I

toss a football

happily on a spring afternoon.

I come back to that refuge.

I see a vision

of a little girl, and her loving big brother

Playing in the

wispy

soft

wet

green

grass.

Life is perfect.

Life is no longer perfect,

but that spot – the first spot -

gives me hope

of a future

as happy as that day

with my brother.

A gentle breeze

makes the flowers

     dance

in the wind.

I love to dance.

And today, I will dance with those

beautiful

vibrant

flowers.

The sun catches the

glitter on the

beautiful dancers below

and sets them on a

       stage

for me to admire.

A stage I know will be

mine

one day -

that day -

when the future is perfect.

I don’t want to leave.

I can’t stand the thought.

This place,

it’s my future.

It’s my past.

It’s my present.

It will always be in

my heart.

I will never leave

even though I must go.

Four paths intersect

at my bench,

by my dancers,

on my stage.

But four paths also

leave.

So much has led me

to this bench.

A life of laughter,

pain,

sorrow,

but never regret.

So many choices lie

ahead of me.

Which path to choose?

Either way, I choose

to follow the sun.

      The sun

will make me shine

like those

beautiful dancers

by my bench

at that spot – the first spot -

when dreams

came alive.

 

Every time I visit my spot, a flood of memories enters my thoughts.  In all of Provo, this is my sanctuary where I go to sort through thoughts, gain peace, and find God.

I deliberately chose to write my thick description in the form of a poem.  Every time I visit this place, the atmosphere feels dreamy, much like Hirsch’s “Edward Hopper and the House by the Railroad.”  Though not every aspect of the poem is happy, like mine, they both still have an aspect of fantasy and surrealism. Thoughts come to my mind like ideas flow through a poem.  Each word has a very specific meaning, just as each thought that enters my mind.  I wanted the words to accurately portray those thoughts that are so purposeful in their confusion.  This poem reminded me of Van Gogh’s “Starry Night.” His painting is so beautifully crafted in a dream-like manner with both structure and freedom.  Every brush stroke has a purpose, and yet the painting, as a whole, seems very whimsical.

My place is a spot on campus less traveled by.  In the bustling of students, this spot remains calm and peaceful.  It is a beautiful garden next to a plot of grass, and nestled in the middle is a modest, brown bench.  The first time I set foot on BYU's campus, my older brother brought me here.  It was the middle of spring and the flowers were in full blossom.  We tossed a football around, which is one of our favorite past times.  I wanted to include this in my thick description because it symbolizes youth and innocence.  Just as my poem explains, this first time I was here, I felt complete joy and happiness like the blissfulness of youth and innocence. 

I wanted my poem to trace my life journey, from the joy of childhood, to the realities of adulthood.  Being an adult has many joys, but definitely comes with its challenges.  My poem shifts from a simple memory a child would have to a recognition of metaphors, in which only adults could understand.  I gave the elements around me, such as the flowers and the sun, personalities to make the place come alive like it does for me.

Four paths diverge and meet at the garden where I like to sit.  I think about this often as I ponder my past and what is ahead of me in my future.  I have gone through a lot in my life, and these events and trials have shaped me into the person I am today and have brought me to that bench.  Similarly, I have so many options ahead of me, just as there are so many paths to choose from.  Each path I take will lead me to a drastically different outcome, but I strongly believe that whichever way I go, it will be a good one.  Still, however, those memories and those places I visited will always be inside of me as my journey continues.